Article: “Christmas carols that are already vegan, #3: ‘We Wish You a Merry Christmas'”

Christmas carols that are already vegan, #3: “We Wish You a Merry Christmas article published

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Christmas carols that are already vegan, #3: “We Wish You a Merry Christmas”

Glorifying violence is not an inherent part of the Christmas holiday season.  Just as formerly non-vegan dishes can be veganized, hymns and songs can be veganized when need be.

Many famous Christmas songs are, in their basic and most popular form, free from any form of express depictions of animal abuse. Where a term is ambiguous—e.g., referring to a product that has a vegan form and a non-vegan form—the ambiguous term need not be veganized. The term can simply be understood in its nonviolent form.

A song that includes such an ambiguous term is “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.”  The verses refer to “figgy pudding,” which can be made in a non-vegan fashion but which can also be made fully vegan.  Thus, this Christmas carol can be sung as-is without the need for veganizing.  Enjoy!

We Wish You a Merry Christmas

We wish you a merry Christmas,
We wish you a merry Christmas,
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year.
Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin;
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year!

Verse 2:
Oh, bring us some figgy pudding,
Oh, bring us some figgy pudding,
Oh, bring us some figgy pudding,
And bring it right here.
Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin;
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year!

Verse 3:
We won’t go till we get some,
We won’t go till we get some,
We won’t go till we get some,
So bring it right here.
Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin;
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year!

Verse 4:
We all like our figgy pudding,
We all like our figgy pudding,
We all like our figgy pudding,
With all its good cheers
Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year.
We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy New Year!

Article: “Christmas carols that are already vegan, #2: ‘I Saw Three Ships’”

Christmas carols that are already vegan, #2: “I Saw Three Ships” article published

Christmas carols that are already vegan, #2: “I Saw Three Ships”

Celebrating holidays without abusing animals is easy. Some famous Christmas carols were “born vegan.” One such carol is “I Saw Three Ships,” of which the exact authorship is unknown.  Enjoy!

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I Saw Three Ships

1. I saw three ships come sailing in,
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
I saw three ships come sailing in,
On Christmas day in the morning.

2. And what1 was in those ships all three?
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
And what was in those ships all three?
On Christmas day in the morning.

3. Our Saviour Christ and his lady2
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
Our Saviour Christ and his lady,
On Christmas day in the morning.

4. Pray whither sailed those ships all three?
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
Pray whither sailed those ships all three?
On Christmas day in the morning.

5. Oh, they sailed into Bethlehem,
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
Oh, they sailed into Bethlehem,
On Christmas day in the morning.

6. And all the bells on earth shall ring,
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
And all the bells on earth shall ring,
On Christmas day in the morning.

7. And all the Angels in Heaven shall sing,
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
And all the Angels in Heaven shall sing,
On Christmas day in the morning.

8. And all the souls on earth shall sing,
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
And all the souls on earth shall sing,
On Christmas day in the morning.

9. Then let us all rejoice, amain,
On Christmas day, on Christmas day,
Then let us all rejoice, amain,
On Christmas day in the morning.

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Other Christmas hymns and songs that are already vegan in their most popular form include Deck the Halls. Previously veganized christmas carols, songs, and hymns include Silent Night and Good King Wenceslas.

Article: “Christmas carols that are already vegan, #1: Deck the Halls’”

Christmas carols that are already vegan, #1: “Deck the Halls” article published

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Christmas carols that are already vegan, #1: “Deck the Halls”

Animal abuse is nothing to celebrate in song or otherwise.  Fortunately, some Christmas carols do not need to be veganized, since, in their popular form, they are already free from cruelty and violence.

One such carol is “Deck the Halls.” The basic lyrics were written in 1862 by Thomas Oliphant to an existing Welsh tune.  Oliphant’s lyrics have been slightly modified over time to reach what is now the most recognized form, appearing below.  Sing on!

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Deck the Halls

Lyrics by: Thomas Oliphant (as modified in version appearing in Pennsylvania School Journal in 1877)

Deck the halls with boughs of holly,
‘Tis the season to be jolly,
Don we now our gay apparel,
Troll the ancient Christmas carol,

See the blazing yule before us,
Strike the harp and join the chorus.
Follow me in merry measure,
While I tell of Christmas treasure,

Fast away the old year passes,
Hail the new, ye lads and lasses!
Sing we joyous all together,
Heedless of the wind and weather,

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Previously veganized christmas carols, songs, and hymns include Silent Night and Good King Wenceslas.

 

Article: “King Wenceslaus Goes Vegan”

King Wenceslaus Goes Vegan” article published

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King Wenceslaus Goes Vegan

Animal abuse and violence have no place in the Christmas season. Modern celebrants of Christmas, therefore, look to retain the values associated with this culturally rich holiday while refusing to grace, legitimize, or tolerate violent practices.

The Christmas hymn “Good King Wenceslas” was written in 1853 by John Mason Neale.  This song has been a standard part of the Christmas celebration since that time.  People who celebrate Christmas, whether in non-religious vegan holiday spirit or in the non-violent Christian tradition, generally recoil at the third verse as originally written, in which the king calls for “flesh.”  It’s unclear whether this line is intended to be a declaration of cannibalism or simple necrovory.  Whatever the case, this repulsive passage is clearly out of character with the rest of the story, in which the King is portrayed as kind, strong, courageous, and generous.

Thus, in order to bring this carol back into working order, a non-violent adaptation is provided below, in which “flesh” is replaced with “bread.”  This replacement is advantageous, because it (i) retains the single syllable and (ii) the essential vowel sound of the original lyric while (iii) eliminating the violent and rather disgusting cannibalism/necrovory and (iv) evoking more appropriate imagery: bread being the “staff of life” is much more powerful in and suitable for this context than is imagery of death and a rotting corpse.

Please feel free to use these lyrics in your Christmas caroling henceforth!

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Good King Wenceslas

Original lyrics: John Mason Neale; Adaptation: S. E. Harrison.

1. Good King Wenceslas looked out
on the feast of Stephen,
when the snow lay round about,
deep, and crisp, and even;
brightly shone the moon that night,
though the frost was cruel,
when a poor man came in sight,
gath’ring winter fuel.

2. ‘Hither, page, and stand by me,
if thou know’st it, telling:
yonder peasant, who is he,
where and what his dwelling?’
‘Sire, he lives a good league hence,
underneath the mountain,
right against the forest fence,
by St. Agnes’ fountain.’

3. ‘Bring me bread and bring me wine,
bring me pine logs hither;
thou and I will see him dine,
when we bear them thither.’
Page and monarch, forth they went,
forth they went together;
through the rude wind’s wild lament,
and the bitter weather.

4. ‘Sire, the night is darker now,
and the wind blows stronger;
fails my heart, I know not how;
I can go no longer.’
‘Mark my footsteps, my good page;
tread thou in them boldly:
thou shalt find the winter’s rage
freeze your blood less coldly.’

5. In his master’s steps he trod,
where the snow lay dinted;
heat was in the very sod
which the Saint had printed.
Therefore, Christians all, be sure,
wealth or rank possessing,
ye who now will bless the poor,
shall yourselves find blessing.

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Article: “Ebenezer Scrooge: Revealing Quotes—’Decrease the Surplus Population’”

“Ebenezer Scrooge: Revealing Quotes—’Decrease the Surplus Population’” article published

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Scrooge Quotes

Ebenezer Scrooge:  Revealing Quotes—“Decrease the Surplus Population”

In the beginning stave of A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens reveals much about the inner workings of Ebenezer Scrooge‘s mind through Scrooge’s verbal expressions.  Here are some examples.

“If they would rather die… they had better do it and decrease the surplus population.”

This statement by Scrooge is in response to the gentlemen who, in Stave 1, enter the “Scrooge & Marley” office and ask for holiday donations.  One of the gentlemen says that many of the poor “would rather die” than go to the “prisons” and “workhouses” that Scrooge has previously suggested as a suitable place to house and care for the poor.

The statement is very effective at introducing us to the landscape of Scrooge’s mind.  He has already countered the gentlemen’s request for money by pointing to the fact that he pays taxes to fund certain institutions.  He then counters their attempt to, indirectly, call upon his pity.  Rather than say something like, “Oh, I didn’t know the prisons and workhouses were that bad,” thereby getting sucked into their pity trap, Scrooge counters again by upping raising the stakes per the above quotation, which indicates clearly that his pity is not available as a point of leverage for would-be fundraisers.

The entire exchange that culminates in this statement shows that Scrooge is very perceptive; he’s not oblivious to human need, cries for pity, and the plight of the poor.  Nor is he oblivious to the verbal tactics with which others attempt to manipulate him.  Nor is he too slow-witted to recognize and counter these attempted manipulations in the very moment in which they are happening.  He is, in short, very perceptive on multiple levels.

Meanwhile, the mathematical and financial relationships realities of the situation are very present and apparent to him.  He views society in terms of the money, math, and numbers. For instance, he’s readily aware of the fact that he is already paying to support certain public institutions. He recognizes, in a Mathusian way, that the resources that he and others pay into the system are not sufficient relative to the existing population.  He, at least ostensibly, views those who are outside of the reach of existing resources as “surplus.”  The fact that he chooses such a dehumanizing word shows that the numbers-based approach is both readily available to his standard way of thinking and also readily available to establish his negotiating position:  pity-based arguments will carry no wait with him.

This interchange, comprising just a few lines that pay off in the multi-layered response quoted above, thus reveals a great deal about Ebenezer Scrooge in a very short span.  It is but one of many examples of Charles Dickens‘ mastery.